Decent Exposure?

     It must be "Support Breastfeeding Week" or something... I've been seeing a lot of posts on breastfeeding in my facebook news feed the past few days.  While I nursed both of my children for several months and am a big supporter of breastfeeding,  many of these posts made me feel sad and sometimes disgusted.  Nowhere in these posts were the health benefits of breastfeeding...the lower cancer rates in mothers who breastfeed or the increased immunities it develops in babies.  Nowhere was there a tale of how it can help bond a mother and child or how it's God's perfect design for nourishing an infant.  All these posts were only about exposing your breasts in public.  I'm serious.  Picture after picture were women nursing without any attempt at covering with captions of how strong and powerful they are for it.  REALLY??

     Why is it that some women think that removing clothing equals power?  I never understand it when I see topless female demonstrators.  They are trying to gain attention, but at what cost?  I fear this bare breast-feeding movement falls in line with this ideology.  Show your boob when you're feeding your baby and you're cool, you're tough, you rock!   If you don't, you're full of shame and fear.  Well,  I reject that.

     I reject that because taking 5 seconds to throw a blanket over my shoulder when I nursed in public was me respecting myself.  It was me respecting my husband and what should be for his eyes only.  It was me respecting my children.  How can I teach my daughter the importance of modesty if I am willing to throw it away under the guise of nursing (uncovered in public that is).  The truth is I was empowered every time I was strong enough to ignore my laziness and take the extra effort to feed my child in a way that pleased God.

     Yes I truly do believe it's pleasing to God to cover yourself when nursing in public.  Here's why.  God tells us to esteem others more highly than ourselves.  And the truth is an exposed body part that's normally covered is going to draw attention.  People can't help but look because it's kind of surprising.  We do a double take unintentionally... that's our mind's way of figuring something out.  And typically the mother starts to get annoyed that people look at her and it creates a tense uncomfortable environment.  We are also called to not be a stumbling block to anyone.  I know many women call a breastfeeding boob "a nonsexual breast".  The reality is it's ignorant to think no man will ever stumble because there's a baby attached.  Remember the breastfeeding scene from "Me, Myself, and Irene"?  That scene wasn't added because no man could relate.  And for young pre-teen/teenage boys, it can be confusing and difficult to process.  Yes a man should control his thoughts, but since I can't be sure he will, I can control what I offer him to put into his mind.  And in my nursing days, all they were getting was a blanket!   

     When my husband and I were newly married we went to a farmer's market.  We were walking in and walking out was a woman with her right breast completely pulled out of her tank top with a 2 year old BARELY latched.  My husband's face turned red, he looked at me like "what in the world?"  and I got very annoyed.  THAT'S being "strong"?  To make a man feel uncomfortable and to taint a soon to be mother's impression of breast-feeding?  It's honestly people like that that create a hostile environment toward nursing in public.  No mother should be told she can't nurse or she had to leave to do so, but being asked to cover up is not offensive.  It's called common courtesy...something sorely lacking in today's culture. 

    Now to the mothers who scream "YOU EAT WITH A BLANKET OVER YOUR HEAD!!!", here's a reality check.  Your infant has been in a fetal position for months and was cramped beyond belief before coming out into this big world.  They were happy, warm and felt safe.  That is why we swaddle and bundle and put hats and mittens and socks on...to recreate that same feeling.  Now all of a sudden a blanket lightly put over the baby, which will make it a little darker, quieter, and warmer (think womb-like), is traumatizing.  I really don't get it.

     My final thought is this...don't fall for the lie... the lie that showing skin equals empowerment.  It's a lie that has gained too much ground.  It may take a LITTLE more effort to throw a cover up on, but taking that extra 30 seconds does a lot.  It puts other people's feelings of being comfortable above your feeling of not wanting to bother with a blanket.  It makes sure that you won't cause anyone to stumble, because as much as a man/teenager should control his thoughts, every person has their own struggles, including you (and me).  It shows your children that you live out your teachings on modesty and it shows your husband you respect him.  I truly believe it creates a nice environment for your baby and it's cleaner!  Nothing can fall on your babies face and there will be no accidental sprayings on people within a 5 foot radius.  If your baby ever unlatched during a letdown, you know what I mean!!!!  

So come on ladies, breastfeeding isn't about everyone looking at us so we can feel cool.  It's about honoring God, respecting ourselves, caring about others and feeding our babies!!!!  Keep it classy & covered!

The Battle of Self

     Can I be honest...I'm SO glad Mother's Day is over.  I woke up with "momzilla" expectations and a self centered attitude that is not normally in my character.  Sure I have my mommy moments of being overwhelmed and feeling sorry for myself, but I'm not the type to begrudge motherhood by any means.  Yet yesterday I struggled with the "what about me" mentality.

     At church that morning, my pastor (who always tells it like it is and I so appreciate that!) said "Get over yourself!  It's not about YOU, it's about HIM!".  I'm pretty sure a big arrow lit up over my head and pointed down at me lol, because that was EXACTLY what I needed to hear.  My spirit lifted and I felt like I was back to a well aligned reality.  Yet shortly after church, the Devil was at it again.  Dropping those thoughts into my head of "Why am I cooking dinner on Mother's Day?  Why am I doing dishes?  I-I-I...Me-Me-Me".  Normally I do these things without a second thought.  No I don't always enjoy them but I do them because I love my family.  Why should that be any different on a day I should be rejoicing at the fact that God made me a mother at all. 

     But that's the way the enemy works...he knows if he can just get our eyes off of Jesus and onto ourselves, we've handed him our peace and joy on a silver platter.  And just because I got the words I needed to hear at church, it does not mean he will run and hide.  God gave me that phrase to combat the devil that day because He knew what was in store for me.  I'm sorry to say I could have done much better with it.  I did (gladly) do something special for my wonderful mom and told my kids several times how thankful I am that I get to be their mommy, but internally I was still struggling.   I can't believe that I am surrounded by all of these incredible blessings and yet there I was having a pity party over a sink full of dishes...seriously?! 

     But joy comes in the morning (we sang a song about that in church too...coincidence?  I think not).  That's the beauty of this life of serving the Lord.  Not only do we get the guidance and help we need...even when we fail, the Lord is there with forgiveness and strength for a new day.  I'm disappointed that I allowed that battle to go on for so long yesterday.  I regret not using the tools God gave me in church that morning to more efficiently stop the negative thoughts and get my eyes back on Him.  But I have learned from it and am determined to remember this lesson so when the Devil tries this on me again, I will squash him immediately with the truth of God's word.  This best sums it up:

"Turn your eyes upon Jesus,
  look full in His wonderful face...
  and the things of Earth will grow strangely dim
  in the light of His glory and grace."